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Pondicherry Readers Speak Out

January 13, 2013 Leave a comment

By Dr. V.I. Chombski
Professor of Specific Literature, University of Eastern Lankville
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It was quite cold the day I started the Pondicherry Book, I would estimate about five degrees (Lankvillian measurements). The station affords a fine view of the Eastern Culture Tower which remains one of the great and few legacies of the Lankville Provincial Revolution. There was also a well-mannered older woman in knee-high white boots eating blue bagels out of a bag.  You better eat those bagels,  I thought lecherously. I don’t even know why or what that even means but I report it nevertheless.

Eventually, we all boarded and the train began its slow crawl through the outlands to the University. For many minutes, I stared lazily at the mean shacks and sheds trackside, the workers shoveling dirt into wagons for seemingly no purpose. Finally, I began Pondicherry.

Then, there was a rumble, an explosion and, shortly thereafter, the vibrations of a violent concussion.  IT’S CHANGING AGAIN, I thought and I began to panic. Everything faded.

And then I was suddenly standing before a fat plumber. He was slowly chewing gum and eyeing me up and down. “I brought the one you asked for, you pathetic shit wedge,” he commented. “36,000 BTU. No fucking around. I’m leaving the giant cardboard box, though.” He was challenging me. “If you think I’m cutting that up and leaving it out for recycling, then you’ve got another thing coming, you insolent mother-loving godless asscone.”

I inquired about the asscone comment. He stopped chewing and his body straightened in a most threatening manner. I let it go.

After he installs the new hot water heater, I guess I’ll finish Pondicherry.

Categories: 2012-13 Season Tags: ,

Pondicherry Readers Speak Out

January 11, 2013 Leave a comment

By Kevin Thurston
Lankville City
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I spend most of my time in very frightening, windowless rooms.  There is no decoration of any sort in my rooms.  Once, I had a poster that depicted two kittens on top of a gigantic ball of yarn.  The caption read KEEP HANGING ON BECAUSE WE’RE KITTENS AND WE DON’T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO.  It was given to me as a present and I thought it was funny for two days but then I took it down and pushed it into a neighbor’s mailbox.

I ordered a copy of the Pondischerries [sic] Book because I believe in small press publications.  This one is particularly nice.  It’s got a big graph inside with statistics of all sorts and some stories and the paper smells vaguely of the East.  It’s a good “snow” book.  By that, I mean it’s good to read when it’s snowing.

The light is beginning to dim.  I only know this because there is a distant section of this apartment where there may be a window.  There is a perpetual state of darkness in my rooms but it is worse at night.

I have a pair of shorts left.  They are loose around the waist.

The rest of Thurston’s account was a series of completed word jumbles.

Categories: 2012-13 Season Tags: ,