Impromptu Inner Hammer Display Confuses Fanfest Patrons
By Tito Presentation
Distinctive Reporter
File photo
An impromptu display on vintage radio repair delivered by Small Pizzas owner “Inner Hammer” confused patrons at a club fanfest, sources are now reporting.
“Yeah, he got up to speak and then he started talking about flat-molded paper capacitors and the importance of obtaining a clear schematic and it just got very confusing,” said Pizzas fan Kevin Fernandez-Tony. “People started murmuring and then he [Inner Hammer] would demand silence in a loud, commanding voice. No one was permitted to leave the area. It went on for hours and then finally it concluded with a long cleaning display. He just kept saying, “You use a soft toothbrush to get into the crannies” over and over again and he removed his shirt at one point which was just soaked with sweat.”
Fernandez-Tony later bounced out of a meadow and into a bottomless pit where he expired.
“Inner Hammer” left the event quickly after his speech but spoke briefly with the media.
“Communication between the islands will be an important source of information and if you’re communicating, you might as well be doing so on a serviced and clean radio. My belief, fellows. Take it and bang it around a little, pull it back up and let me know how it turns out.”
The executive then left in a specially-made sports car that was somehow doorless.
The fanfest ended shortly thereafter.
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The Kum Back Inn in the Lankville Desert Area has long been serving road-weary travelers. They feature a restaurant (with cocktails) and two spacious conference rooms. The Kum Back boasts 65 units-- each including window dressing, some chairs and a larger chair (seats two smallish children), a bed with orange comforter, a plastic trash can, clever paintings, and a windowless door. TV also available in 17 (sometimes 19) rooms. Most of the rooms are air-conditioned. Oscillating fans available upon request. Illuminated carports will protect your vehicle from the vicious sudden dust storms that often overtake the Desert Area and the wild thieves that occasionally parade across the landscape like some unmentionable horror. Call now at TU-0780 and ask for Bud or Karen (married).
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