Home > 2012-13 Season > Royer Attends Nearby Outdoor Event

Royer Attends Nearby Outdoor Event

By Larry “God” Peters
Far-Flung Areas Correspondent
File photo

Institutionalized Terrifying Bat GM Ric Royer attended a nearby outdoor event yesterday, sources are reporting.

“It was thrilling and I didn’t fall down or scream once,” the executive noted later at the Foontz-Flonnaise Home of Abundant Senselessness.  “They had some side streets cordoned off and some tables and a man made some announcements.  There seemed to be a mass localized understanding of some sort of significant event but I allowed that to elude me as one would allow an errant soft child’s beach squeeze toy to drift slowly past over the lustrous and brilliantined surf.”

Royer suddenly set a trident on fire and had to be restrained.  The interview was ended prematurely.

“We’ll look into his possible attendance at other nearby outdoor events in the future,” noted Warden Jenness of the Home.  “It may be beneficial in reintegrating him into society.”

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