Home > Royer's Madcap Experiences > Royer’s Madcap Experiences: I, Tire Salesman

Royer’s Madcap Experiences: I, Tire Salesman

September 26, 2013 Leave a comment Go to comments

By Ric Royer
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Once, I got a job as a tire salesman.  I decided on an aggressive approach.

A man walked in.

“Hey, asshole.  You want to buy these tires?” I yelled.

He looked shocked, amazed.

“I…I’m just looking.”

“There ain’t no looking at these motherfuckers, chump,” I yelled, patting a nearby set of white walls.  “You either buy or you are no use to me.  Tire Garden can get along fine without your bullshit money.”

He asked to speak to the manager.

I approached the door of Gary’s office.  Gary was in there playing solitaire on a laptop.

“There’s a rapist out here, wants to talk to you,” I yelled loudly.

Gary said nothing.  Just looked at me with those weary red eyes.

They let me go that afternoon.

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