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Challenge Ring Busted Top Cop Says

Buck Igloos

Buck Igloos

LANKVILLE ACTION NEWS: YES!

A massive Southern Outlands challenge ring was busted this morning according to Lankville top cop Houston Gee-Temple.

“We had a young man and woman, operating out of a modest rancher surrounded by hedges,” the intrepid lawman noted at a press conference held on the lawn of the home. “We believe that they were the masterminds behind most of the challenges in the Southern and Southeastern Outlands. We have boarded up the home and will be knocking down some of the hedges by the end of the day.”

Challenge Ring

Byrnes and Savers are led away.

An aide whispered something briefly to Gee-Temple at which time the detective amended, “we will not be knocking down the hedges, excuse me.”

The individuals taken into custody are believed to be Lance Byrnes and Diane Savers, both 18, of the Outlands.

“I knew Lance. He was an Honor Roll Student and a junior member of the Koala Bears and Walnuts Club,” Gee-Temple commented. “We believe that this Savers woman was the instigator– a willing wanton, a sordid she-wolf, if you will. She was a girl who was willing to do anything to get what she wanted. What we have here really is the provocative story of a naive young man caught up in a whirlpool of thunder, a hurricane of lust. It’s terrible when that happens to nice boys like Lance.”

The pair may be responsible for as many as 200 challenges dating back to 2011.

“[Diane] began her challenge spree confidently but it all came crashing down this morning when we knocked politely at her door and took her off to a place where she can no longer control the world by pulling her curves over its spherical surface,” Gee-Temple stated.

“That place is jail,” the detective added after a long silence.

Bail has been set at $50,000 (Lankville).

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