Home > Sports > Wild Kangaroo Interrupts Pizzas’ Morning Skate

Wild Kangaroo Interrupts Pizzas’ Morning Skate

January 23, 2013 Leave a comment Go to comments

By Grady Kitchens
Senior Staff Writer
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A wild kangaroo interrupted the Small Pizzas’ morning skate, sources are reporting.

“I first spotted it way up near the exits,” said forward Claude Giroux, who was closest to the wayward marsupial. “It was staring right at me, just daring me to say something. When I looked next, it was hopping down the ramp and then right out onto the ice.  The look on its face was chilling.”

“It was challenging us, all of us, all of humanity,” Giroux added.

“There was nothing that could be done,” noted a Small Pizzas executive, who refused to be identified. “Security came along but the kangaroo very calmly threw them into the boards. The guards then attempted to utilize a taser but it had absolutely no effect. The [kangaroo] just went right back to its infernal steely-eyed staring.”

“You could tell it had ice water in its veins,” said blueliner Michael Del Zotto. “It was not going anywhere.”

Practice was ended early and the kangaroo was still occupying the ice at press time.

The Small Pizzas are scheduled to host Darkness tonight at 7PM.

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