Ramping it Up For Easter with BIG CHIPS

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Ramping it Up For Easter with BIG CHIPS

April 8, 2014 Leave a comment Go to comments

By BIG CHIPS

Yo, for the first time in a long-ass time, I suggested to Pops that we get some Easter decorations.

“What do you have in mind Cur…I mean, Big Chips,” Pops said, as we were chilling around the table eating some take-out wings.

“There’s a spread a few blocks from here. Got a big inflatable Easter bunny, right in the front yard.” I sat back and let that hang for a minute.

“No. No, I’m afraid not, Big Chips,” Pops said after he wiped his mitts clean of BBQ sauce. “Those inflatable decorations are cheap and tend to deflate easily. I’m not sure that you’re ready for that kind of responsibility.”

“I guess not,” I agreed. “Yo, Pops, what if we just get a couple a’ baskets. Some of that yellow Easter grass. Be awesome, yo!”

Pops took out his wallet. “I tell you what, Big Chips. I’ll give you ten dollars. See what you can get with that.” Then he started reading his paper and I just ended up falling asleep on the couch in front of this flick about aliens that came down with all these bags full of packing peanuts.

I slept until about two in the afternoon and then I took the ten and headed down to The Dollar Bush on my bike.

“Yo, what you got for Easter?” I asked the brown girl behind the counter. She had some smokin’ blonde hair and big round glasses and, I won’t bullshit you, she was maximum busty. It was awesome. She pointed in the direction of the holiday aisle and went back to filing her nails.

Detail of typical Easter grass.

Big Chips picked out a couple of baskets and got two bags of Easter grass (green and yellow). I ditched the pink on account of finances. The girl rang me up and it came to five cents shy of the ten.

“Yo, right on target,” I said. She bagged everything up. I thought about asking for her digits but she didn’t look Big Chips’ way. To hell with it, I thought. Look at this Easter shit. It was a god damn haul.

I set it up on the mantle. It was beautiful. I sat on the couch for three straight hours just waiting for Pops to come home.

When he walked in the door, I pointed at the mantle. “The Big Chips Easter Committee is donnnnnnneeee,” I said. Pops had a bunch of mail or papers or something in his hand and seemed distracted. “It’s real nice Cur…I mean, Big Chips. Real nice.”

He went up to his room to change. Another successful day in the books.

Cause when you’re ramping it up for Easter with BIG CHIPS, you don’t need a safety net.

Categories: Ramping it Up with BIG CHIPS Tags: Devon Fick, Humor, Lankville

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Mikhail Goberman

April 8, 2014 at 12:47 pm

Reply

Fuck yeah, Big Chips, fuck yeah.

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