Home > Presidential Addresses > Pondicherry on the Public Nudity Epidemic in Lankville

Pondicherry on the Public Nudity Epidemic in Lankville

President Pondicherry has a new dog!

President Pondicherry

Three weeks ago, a nude man attempted to buy some stationary. Only a few miles away, a nude woman ate some ice cream on a public gazebo. It was a hot day. The ice cream melted considerably before she could finish. I don’t think I need to say anymore.

Yesterday, over 100 people were arrested for public nudity. Let me sum it up. Lankville needs a new direction.

A change of course that will put clothes back on the people, achieve independence from nudity and advance the cause of world understanding.

We have the ability. I want you to tell me about your abilities. Write about your abilities on scented paper and using fuchsia-colored inks. Send me your letters. I want them. I need them.

One of the new signs.

One of the new signs.

With your help, Lankville, we are distributing signs. You may have noticed the crude yellow wood boxes on your street corners. You may have wondered, “what is inside yonder boxes?” I am here to tell you. The signs. The signs are in the boxes. Put them up. Put them up everywhere. In every yard, in every alley, to the entrance of every beach. Join me in ushering in a new period of prosperity, add your star to the beacon-light of liberty for the whole world. The signs are brown.

God bless you and God Bless Lankville.

President Pondicherry

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